It’s A Rough Life: Gnocchi’s Guide to Eating, Sleeping & Stirring Up Trouble

Since I’m busy elsewhere during MoFo month, I asked some special friends to help out over here. Today’s post gives us a glance into the fuzzy, creative genius that is Gnocchi the bunny rabbit.

Guest post: Gnocchi

Friend: Kelly of The Vegan Cookie ConnoisseurSeitan Beats Your Meat

Duiiiiiii./d´÷´\\ cvmcv cv gvg.hv;fcllllv. ;ddkxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxcflbn.ddnxzzzzzzzzzzzzndxxxxxxxxgbb bb k,,,,,,,,,,,,cv jcfjfgkhb;rtr4mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmcjk*

*I have no idea what that says (he doesn’t know how to read, but he thinks he knows how to write), but I don’t want to hurt Gnocchi’s feelings. Luckily, he got tired of typing and asked me to type for him. –Kelly

I love eating. And pooping. Then eating again. Repeat all day. My food tastes the best when I tip over the bowl and it spills all over the place. I’m super chubby and I like to sleep and I’m SO adorable. I like to read blogs and hang out in Kelly’s lap when we’re on the internet. We take SO many pictures. 99% of our Photobooth collection is pictures of me. My favorite foods are honeydew and apples.

I hate toys. I would much rather eat other fun stuff like the kitchen chairs, the bathroom door, Q tips I find on the bathroom floor, folders and cardboard under the couch, and Macbook cords (I destroyed one with a little bite this one time. It was HILARIOUS). Once I tried coffee but I didn’t really like it, so I tipped the cup over onto the carpet in protest. Ripping up the carpet is a lot of fun too.

I model for Upton’s Naturals during the day when Kelly is gone. I’m also a professional napper and a catnip dealer. If you’ve never tried it, Carrot Seitan is DELICIOUS!

I REALLY hate getting my hair did. But I love cuddling so I dealt with it. Plus, the ‘do looks great. If we super duper cuddle and you’re really quiet, I’ll make little squeaky noises.

I love donuts, but I love wine even more. I want to be a unicorn for Halloween. I hope I get to eat lots of candy and poop rainbows. 

Kelly’s friends over at Canary Confectionery made a cake version of me. To be honest, I was TERRIFIED, but they said it’s more scared of me than I am of it.

Did I mention I love cuddling? I like to pretend I’m too big for baby talk, but I love that shit. That’s how I get new nicknames everyday, like squishable cutieface baby bunny boy, fluffy puppycakes, or pumpkinbutt. But now I need to take a nap and dream of eating. Goodnight!